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JackassmotherfuckiniPad: How do ya like that?

Billie,

Love the time wasting potential of the new device. After a few weeks, the smarting pain of my wife’s nature–and knowing what $700 of iPad, warrantee, and cover can do with interest compounded over the course of 20 years–will fade. At that point, I will consider the iPad a fixture of the house, just like the million other wasted dollars of failed consumerism around here.

Yours,
Patrick

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